Crystal Aura Gaze

I cannot describe my love for Venus. She was confident, bold, sassy, demanding, super vocal, outgoing, bossy, and brave. Venus was the alpha cat. The world will be such a quiet and empty place without her.

Venus was so much more than a cat. She helped me get through my darkest days, when I was at rock bottom, when I wanted to give up in life – she kept me going.

As the vets would describe her – “she’s busy” – a restless cat with too much energy. There were always places to go, things to do, stuff to see. She could never sit still for too long. Getting picked up and walking around the home together was preferred over sitting still on my lap for too long.

Even though Venus loved to explore – trying to escape, going outside, following her own agenda – she always came back to me. Every time I called her, she ran over to me. When we visited my parents and I would occasionally let her out in the backyard, the second I would call her name, she ran right back inside. Even though she wanted to go far, she always came back to me.

Venus met many people and animals throughout her life. She was never shy, never scared of anyone. She accepted affection with great pride. I will feel her loss the strongest of everyone, but I won’t be the only one to feel it.

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Life story

Venus was born in South Carolina on July 23, 2016 before being transported to Quakertown, PA. She was adopted at 12 weeks old; her name at adoption was Grace. She was an American shorthair, grey tabby (with hints of brown and a little black and white.)

It was late October 2016. I was 21-years old and in my last semester at college. At the time, my pet bunny (Titan) had suddenly passed away at a young age. I had him for a little over a year. At the time, I was extremely devastated of his passing — but it is crazy to think that it led me to Venus…

I told my boyfriend, Kevin, that I wanted him to surprise me with a cat for my birthday. I really wanted him to be the one to pick her out — I just said that it must be a girl. My mind was really cloudy from the grief of Titan and I felt like my judgement wasn’t in the right place, so I trusted him with that decision.

Kevin surprised me a whole three weeks before my actual birthday. He showed up to my apartment and let the kitten out without even saying anything. Out of nowhere, I see this tiny kitten walking around and meowing.

Venus is a name that we picked out together. I loved it because I was into both astrology and Roman mythology at the time (still am.) And we were both really into space. “Venus” is the goddess of love and pleasure.

For the first two months, I lived in an apartment with my friend Bre. Venus was a college cat. She became accustomed to lots of people coming in and out of the apartment. My strongest memory is when I freaked out because she went missing, so there was like eight of us running around the apartment, frantically trying to find her. Eventually, she casually came out (probably from a deep nap.)

I graduated in December and lived at home with my parents for several months. This is probably Venus’s favorite time. She had a whole house that she could run around in — plus I occasionally let her outside for short periods. Also, at this time, she got neutered.

Venus started going into heat back while we were at the apartment in college, probably around 5-6 months old. I wanted her to go into heat once before getting neutered, according to my research this was the healthier option than doing it too soon. She would yowl and cover her face and wag her tail around.

In summer 2017, I moved away and into a studio apartment with my boyfriend — and Venus. We had a small patio on a very high floor and let her out — but she ran across the rail two apartments over and I had to chase her across the balconies just to pick her up and run her back inside. From then on, we kept her on a leash.

Kevin and I tried to leash train her by taking her to parks. She enjoyed her time outside but really struggled with the leash, so we only did this a few times. We also tried letting her free roam during car rides, but she ended up running towards the gas pedal or jumping to the front window, so of course quickly stopped that.

The following year, my boyfriend and I moved to a bigger apartment. Venus definitely appreciated having more space. But she was so incredibly hyperactive. When it was time to sleep and I climbed on the bed, she used to jump out from under and scratch my legs. She wanted me to stay up and play.

At this point, she’s about 2-years old, extremely yet playfully aggressive. She demanded attention — through constant meows and jumping on your face. If you didn’t play with her before bed, she’d basically attack you for it. Sometimes, I was a little bit terrified! Before getting into bed, I’d have to scan underneath and make sure she wasn’t getting ready to claw me. At this point, she became ruler of the household, and we revered her!

I feel bad though, there were definitely plenty of times when I didn’t give her enough attention and didn’t get all of her energy out. I also know it was hard for her to go from living in a big house and going outside to stuck in a little apartment (but I frequently brought her back to my parents for little vacations!)

Venus was obsessed with treats. Very quickly, she learned the word “treats!” Which I would squeal to her in a high pitched voice. Instantly, she perked up and ran to the kitchen every time. It may be the only human word she ever learned. I took her to the vet and they said that she was getting a little overweight. She really, really loved her treats and we probably gave her too many.

I always bought Venus a mix of super high quality food mixed with more affordable food. I always felt that the more expensive food, that had completely natural ingredients, were vital for good health. But I also felt that it could be safely balanced with a little bit of “standard” cat food that’s way more affordable, just for financial purposes.

In early 2020, I moved out into a bigger apartment on my own. It was just Venus and me. (We also had a guinea pig named Athena.) And in June 2020, I took home a new kitten named Luna. Luna was so excited to meet Venus and ran right towards her as soon as she saw her. Venus, on the other hand, was much more skeptical. Luna liked to cuddle with Venus, but Venus took a while to warm up.

The reason why I got another cat wasn’t because Venus “wasn’t enough”… trust me, she was more than enough! A big reason was because Venus was so easily bored and under-stimulated. And a lot of Venus’s “bad behavior” stopped once Luna came along – now that she had someone to ware her out and keep her company when I was gone.

There were a couple of years when it was just Venus, Luna, and me. There was a moment in time when my two cats were the only ones who I had to lean on. Just the three of us ladies against the world.

Sometimes, I’d be sitting there watching TV or on my phone, and the two of them would just stare at me. They’d be like, “so what’s up? What’s going on? What’re we doing next?” That’s when I knew that they were bored and trying to play.

I woke up in the morning, and it was just my two cats. I came home from work, and it was just my two cats. I got into bed and went to sleep, and it was just my two cats. We survived a pandemic together—when everyone had covid for Christmas 2021, I spent Christmas with just my two cats.

Of course I still had friends come over who got to meet Venus and Luna. I visited my parents back home pretty often, so I would take them with me. I took my cats to my aunt and uncle’s house several times. Venus got to meet many people and go many places!

Athena, the guinea pig, ended up dying. I could tell that Venus could feel her loss. She really enjoyed watching her. Several months later, I adopted 2 new guinea pigs (Skully & Bones). They were albinos rescued from animal testing. Both Venus and Luna loved them! They would jump in their cage and sit with them, sometimes gently paw them.

The guinea pigs actually liked the cats more than they liked me! They were far more accepting of Venus and Luna, just chillin with them, even giving little kisses. They were much, much more skittish around me!

Sadly, a little less than a year later, Skully & Bones died. This was an even greater loss than Athena because Venus had been much more interactive with them. It was hard to watch her deal with their loss.

I got back together with Kevin in late 2022, and I feel really bad for the time that was missed with Venus. She certainly did not forget him. Kevin and I would be talking— and she’d have to be a part of the conversation, she’d have to stand in the circle and meow at us like she was talking with us. She hated feeling left out!

Venus was with me through the several years of losing Mom. She was there when Mom was alive and well, when we were living together for those couple of months. She was there when Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and beginning it was starting to progress. And she was there when my Mom passed away last summer.

Every day that I came home from work (or wherever), Venus would come to the door and greet me. She loved to walk up to me and then plop herself on the ground. Venus meowed all the time, sometimes extended meows like she was singing. She also had the cutest “silent meows” in which she opened her mouth and let out the tiniest breath of air – those were my favorite! And when she was frustrated, she made this huffing noise, like “hmph!”

Venus was a fighter, even in her final days when her body was suddenly failing. Only a few weeks prior, she seemed a little lethargic and less hungry. If you didn’t know her, you’d assume she was fine – but I could just tell that something was off. The vets were just as shocked as I was to see how much was actually going on inside her body.

On Thursday, when they saw what was going on, I almost had to put her down right then and there. When I went to see her again, she was squirming around, meowing, and super alert – which was also shocking. So, I decided on one more night.

We had a gentle and relaxing last night together. Once back home, her alertness dropped, and then it became more clear that she was unwell. That next morning, we were sitting in bed together. She reached out her paw and tapped my leg, put her paw back, and then reached out to tap me again. It felt very surreal and not like normal cat behavior, it felt more human to me.

On Friday morning at the vet, her alertness came back and she was meowing again. Even the technician who had just met her could see that she was the alpha cat. She was also surprised at how active and alert she was, which shows how much that her personality shines, even in that moment. I was petting Venus the whole time.