Gram

I just got the news that my grandma passed away last night. I’m really going to miss her, and would like to dedicate some words & memorable photos in her honor…

Growing up, I was very close with my Gram. For a grandma who comes from a completely different time, stuck in her ways, she still managed to be the life of the party — always ready to play games, sing, dance, and have fun. She never let aging stop her, making an effort to stay active and keep in shape. Her restless soul would never let her slow down. 

I believe Gram’s greatest pet peeve was missing out (serious FOMO) and so she pushed herself to keep up with the rest of the family, even if that meant going on strenuous hikes with us even though she was in her 80s. Family was the most important thing to Gram and she is a big reason why we stayed close over the years. 

Gram lived life to the absolute fullest — the liveliest person you could ever meet. In fact, she made a point to celebrate the birthdays of those who passed away long ago — for example, “my grandpa would have been 130 years old today, so I made this cake to celebrate his 130th birthday! Happy 130th, grandpa!”

I have wonderful memories of spending the week at Gram’s during summers. She loved taking her grandchildren to Premise Made and spoiling us with ice cream and candy. Lolipops were always fully stocked in her car. One of her favorite things to do with the family was play board games — and she was fiercely competitive. During a game of spoons, she once punched her grandson over the last spoon. Losing was another great pet peeve of hers.

Gram loved being the center of attention and entertaining everyone. She was always photo-ready and you could never catch her in sweats or makeup-less. But if you try to complement her, she could never take it, and would dismiss you immediately. Gram loved dancing and took tap lessons well into her 70s. As much as she complained about “today’s music just sounding like noise,” and how much she preferred her jazzy old-school sounds, you would still catch her dancing like no one’s watching to Beyonce at weddings.

I found Gram to be a wonderful, totally one-of-a-kind, irreplaceable grandma. She was a great role model for her grandchildren. Strong morals were very important to her. Much of her time was spent volunteering and giving service to those less fortunate. She was highly religious but never forced her beliefs on others. She never drank alcohol. One of my favorite lines (from Matt & Kat’s wedding)…

Gram: Julie, aren’t you going to drink wine? You’re 18 now.

Julie: I can’t, the drinking age is 21.

Gram: I wish it was 21!

Julie: No, it is 21…

Gram: I know, I wish the drinking age was 21! That’s how it should be!

Her life was full of so many battles — but her struggles made her stronger and Gram was a fighter who could not accept loss. She also came from a time when women were conditioned to be housewives: voiceless and blindly obedient to men. And yet she was able to rise above sexism — she is the one of the most independent women I have even known. Gram taught me that age is just a number, and how important it is to keep pushing yourself. When she was happy, she was absolutely joyous, and nothing in the world could bring her down. What made her happiest was being surrounded by people who care.