Disclaimer: I want to write a disclaimer because I’m going to talk about gender roles and I don’t want it to come off offensive. I want to state that gender does not have to apply to physical sex, and whatever you feel you identify with is valid. When I talk about masculine and feminine energy, it does not have to be strictly man and woman. I believe energy is fluid and we all possess both. This is about embracing whichever energy that comes most natural to you. If you feel you possess both equally then this post will not apply to you but you can still read it for your entertainment. No disrespect intended, thank you!
With the fairytale, comes tradition, and that includes traditional gender roles.
I understand the potential harm, limitation, and oppression against gender roles. What I’m discussing right now is the “fairytale” version of gender roles, which looks at it though a romanticized (and not necessarily realistic) viewpoint.
I think that from a romanticized view, gender roles can be a very romantic thing. And this is what I will be focusing on for this post.
What a woman truly wants is a manly man. She won’t fall for him unless he is man enough. But the thing is that, if she cannot be woman enough for him, then he can’t be a man.
I believe many relationships fail because the woman sucks the masculinity out of the man or the man sucks all the femininity out of the woman.
Attraction is about polarity. The most basic example is the magnet: opposites attract — they both have the same charges, but they connect at the opposite charge.
A more spiritual example of polarity is happiness and sadness. The people who feel the highest highs also feel the lowest lows. Taking antidepressants makes you less sad, but also makes you less happy, as it balances out so you lose your emotional polarity.
A relationship without polarity may have less lows, but also has less highs, thus creating a feeling of numbness. Attraction is lost and it becomes much more tiring to keep it together.
We should not fear polarity. We can have equality while also maintaining polarity when we embrace our natural energy. There is no light without darkness, no ups without downs, no highs without lows. The positive feels great, but the negative holds valuable lessons and growth. Only through the negative, do we become stronger.
Many of us fear negativity/darkness/lows/etc. so badly that we numb ourselves, completely missing out on the positives/lightness/highs. That’s not living!
A relationship that is numb may feel safer, but it’s not. It’s very dangerous to numb yourself. You lose empathy, you become depressed, you feel like there’s just no point. Not just relationships, but everything in life — all your emotions, all you think and feel and do.
Embrace your energy. Don’t judge it. You should never become overly attached to your role, as with anything in life, because we are all boundless spirits. But work with what you have or else you will struggle. Whichever energy you carry more of, immerse yourself in that energy, and your partner will give you the balance you need.
I am also going to dismantle the stereotypes of feminine and masculine. Gender roles can be offensive when they assume things that are definitely not true.
Being a feminine is wonderful! You are soft, sensitive, and delicate like a flower. When someone seems angry, you pick up on that energy and feel like you have to run away from them. When someone yells at you or says something in a nasty tone, you cry your eyes out. When you and your friends are excited, you all squeal and cheer together. You are extremely sensitive to people’s energies which makes you gifted at reading others and understanding how they feel. You can see everyone’s own unique perspectives.
Your emotions run high and change all the time. You have an inner cycle that is constantly in flux. As long as you pay attention to your cycle, your emotions are actually highly predictable compared to the masculine’s. Change is part of your life, so you are gifted at adapting. You handle unpredictable situations with ease. You can adjust to different things naturally. You can multitask. You are a complex, multifaceted being with many layers. Everything blends and flows together for you; it’s hard to perceive anything as separate from one another.
You are all about feeling. You don’t have to see something to believe it, you just feel it. You are blind to the world and navigate through touch. Your senses are heightened. You are more about “being” than “doing.” Living internally, you often go within. You are highly aware of, and comfortable with, your emotions. Your intuition is strong and magical. You are intensely connected to the spiritual and everything that goes beyond the physical.
You have a need to be protected and conserved. You still know how to defend yourself very well. But you feel safer around other woman or a man you can trust. You have a softness and innocence that should be held onto, this is what keeps you so intuitive and emotionally strong. You do not want to develop a hard shell because you value your internal strength. Being gentle enhances your beauty and makes others feel better. You feel more secure when others are looking out for you. A support system is vital and appreciated.
You are the receiver. You are gifted at opening up and sharing your most inner self.
You can still be dominant, be the boss, or be the achiever. You can do it by honoring your feminine self and embracing your most natural traits. You are extremely powerful!!!
Being a masculine is also wonderful! You have a rugged and hard shell but you still feel deeply beneath it all. You can still be very sensitive and empathetic, but you are better at detaching yourself when it’s necessary. You are able to see things from a logical and rational perspective. You can punish someone without remorse, not due to lack of empathy, but due to strong sense of “right vs. wrong” or “us vs. them.” Very easily, you are able to remove yourself from the blindfold of emotions, and see the things for what they truly are. But when you do face your emotions, they are absolutely all-consuming, and the rest of the world tunes out. You are either in your emotions or out of them and there is no in between.
You focus on one thing at a time. You perceive everything as separate. You see clear and distinct borders. Everything must be in order and control. You feel best handling expected and predictable situations. You yourself can be highly unpredictable, so you need supportive energy that can handle uncertainty. You are talented at setting rules and discipline. You are firm with what you say. You prioritize what’s important and forget the rest. At your highest vibration, you always keep promises and demand loyalty.
You are all about the physical. You are most comfortable with physical tasks and you prefer to express yourself physically. Seeing is believing. You are gifted with tools and machinery, as you have a strong curiously for how things function. You are highly aware of your surroundings. You have incredible strength and muscle. Your restless energy keeps you active. You are simple and straight-forward, you know exactly what you want.
You have the need to protect. Justice is important to you. You will take down anyone who threatens your partner, your team, or whatever you are a part of, no matter the cost. Getting rough and tough brings you confidence. You are always on guard and ready to fight when necessary. Being the winner and being #1 feels the best.
You are the giver. You go for what you want and you shoot your shot.
You can still be sweet and peaceful, be a caregiver, be a homemaker. You do it in your own way that honors your masculine energy. You are also extremely powerful!!!
to be continued…