Crystal Aura Gaze

Humans started as a community, a tribe, a social circle. We evolved because we all leaned on each other and helped each other out. We did not evolve by isolating ourselves.

However, society has now become extremely isolated. Maybe it’s the internet giving us this false sense of community that cannot replace face to face interaction. Maybe it’s the television providing a false sense of social interaction that we are not actually a part of. Or maybe it’s consumerism in which we all own our own things and therefore do not have to ask others for their help.

When I look back on the Covid pandemic, I try to see it from a spiritual perspective and figure out what we all could learn from this tragedy. It was a dark and horrible time — but you can find purpose from pain.

I wrote this post titled “It took a pandemic to make me realize that I’m not antisocial.” What I learned from the pandemic, and what I think we were supposed to learn, is that we are social beings who are not meant to be isolated. The face masks, the six-feet spaces between others, the shutdowns of public spaces, etc, made us realize that isolation is no way to live.

We joked about how we loved being in quarantine, how we got some relief from outside responsibilities, how we got to just stay home and relax more. But to be honest, it got old very quickly. One example is that a lot of people became alcoholics during this time because it gave them the freedom to drink whenever they wanted to.

Shortly before the pandemic started, before I had any idea what was about to happen, I was already ready to isolate myself. I reached the conclusion that perhaps I was antisocial. And I got this idea in my head that being alone would bring freedom, enlightenment, and ultimate happiness. I thought that other people were just holding me back.

But it took that period of isolation to understand that I was certainly not antisocial, but very much a social being — because I am a human being. I had to admit that needing others didn’t make me weak — it made me human. This was a hard pill to swallow.

So I looked back on all of the times that maybe I was “too much” for people. There have been times throughout my life, my childhood, teenage years, and adulthood in which I showered people with love. There were times when I chased people, I came on too strong, and I loved without inhibitions.

I don’t regret any of this. I regret the times that I did hold back. I regret the times when I was so closed off that people didn’t know that I cared about them. These are the only moments that we should regret.

It’s embarrassing and cringeworthy to remember the times when you loved too hard, when you displayed too much affection. But this takes bravery and should be applauded.

It’s a shame that we went through this collectively dark experience and there are still so many people who choose isolation. Some people didn’t learn what they were supposed to learn.

Boundaries can be a good thing, sometimes very necessary, but people today take this concept too far and use it as an excuse to build walls. Privacy is valuable, but too much privacy is what leads to shame. This creates an environment in which we are all embarrassed to simply be ourselves.

In olden times, children used to share bedrooms. You can even find houses where the entire family lives in a single room. And even up until the 2010s, people didn’t have their own phones. They shared their computer with the family. Before steaming services, we had to take turns picking channels, we didn’t have our own TV shows. As recent as 10-15 years ago, we used to have to share all of these things.

And now, everybody just wants to be on their own devices, their own password protected accounts, locked in their own bedroom, isolating themselves from the world. Nobody wants to share or be open when they have the chance to live life completely closed on their own terms.

Living on your own terms is overrated. This leads to selfishness — a self-centered society in which we all have inflated egos. We’re all caught up in our OWN feelings. We don’t care about how our actions impact OTHERS. We don’t want to share because that means that we have to be selfless.

But I believe that our natural state as human beings is selflessness. We were designed to care about others, to compromise, to share. When you live life with a closed heart, you’re missing out. Sure, it feels good at first. But overtime, it’s going to rot your soul.